Hey folks *rips down some cobwebs* yes I’m still here and yes I still do plan to actually do something with this damn website. There are going to be some changes with Shattered Pixel soon, this should come as no surprise to those of you who have been following me since the early 00-Evan Reviews days, I have a habit of redoing the website about once a year, and it’s that time again!

This time around it’s a change in blogging software and visual presentation. After some prompting by a few people(you know who you are, thankyou), It’s become quite clear to me that wordpress, especially a custom wordpress installation on a free host, is simply not the blogging solution that’s best suited for what I’m doing. The domain name ShatteredPixel.com is staying, and so is all(or most) of the site’s current content, but I’m moving to Tumblr!

Tumblr’s built in hosting, customization, social aspects, and format all seem to be a much better fit for what I’m doing here. While I’ve learned a lot by making my own custom website I think it’s time I swallow my pride and realize that a more general solution works better. Shattered Pixel will be getting a redesign and will be moving hosting/backend to Tumblr over the next month or so. Don’t worry I’m going to do everything possible to make Shattered Pixel look at least somewhat different from the legion of generic Tumblr blogs. Old comments will be lost and some old articles may be lost as well, but after this happens I’m going to be in a much better position moving forward.

In addition to this, I’ve also been considering what exactly it is I want to do with this website. Expect a change of pace with the tumblr version of Shattered Pixel: more articles of smaller size; more of a focus on original arguments and opinions and content; less of a focus on description and wordiness; and the return of frequent reviews, both in text and video form.

Hope to see you all there after the switch, if you have any concerns about this you can Contact me or voice them in the comments below. Note that I’ve disabled comments for unregistered users because the website as it is is essentially done with and I’m getting really tired of dealing with 30+ spam comments a day. If you don’t have an account then just E-mail me.

Okay so if you don’t know what I’m talking about already let me fill you in, feel free to skim down if you’re already acquainted with Ocean and its recent PR disaster.

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The Controller in Question

Ocean marketing is an internet marketing company (duh) which was in charge of the marketing and customer relations for a product called the Avenger, which is a controller extension for the PS3. The product itself is not important however, what is important is the trip one brave, brave customer called Dave took into the darkest corner of customer service hell.

In short, Dave preordered this controller extender for Christmas and a legitimate complaint about shipping dates spiraled into a massive internet shitstorm that started when Mike(Gabe) from Penny Arcade posted Dave’s email chain Here.

…yeah, this is real, Paul actually said those things. Paul who is not just some rep, but in fact the PRESIDENT OF OCEAN MARKETING. It is worth noting that the actual makers of the Avenger controller extension are not directly responsible for this, and they have dropped Ocean like a rock.

The Asshat in Question

So now, as one can expect, the entire internet hates both Ocean and Paul, and the consequences of this have been severe. The loss of business for Ocean (an internet company may I remind you) is obvious, but Paul as an individual has had things quite badly too, eventually leading to A Followup To The Original Penny Arcade Post.

This has already spread all over the internet to several blogs, Twitter, and even Memebase in the span of about a day, now going full circle to having a Comic About It back on the originator site Penny Arcade. Even more crap is slowly surfacing about Paul, such as A History of Domestic Violence.

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Anyway, now that we’re all up to date with the latest internet drama bomb, why is it important? To me it’s important for more than just the shock value or the resulting smearing of Paul, it’s important because this is a situation every one of us can relate to. Paul is a bully, a bully of the worst sort, and all of us have been bullied at some point in our lives. People often talk about issues like bullying in schools, but few people talk about how this means of treating others, often associated with elementary school, is a very present issue for many people in the adult world. It’s individuals like Paul who provide the best example of an adult world bully, an individual who likely strong-armed his way into his position, has a history of violence, and has now used his position of power to do exactly what it is that bullies do in schoolyards.

The only difference this time is that Paul’s recent victim shared his story with the internet, and in doing so enticed Paul into picking on someone far too big to handle. Now Paul resorts to hiding behind his wife and children as a means of protecting himself from the unrelenting stream of hate that is coming this way. This is why I think the internet is so ravenously attacking Paul, because he is someone we can all remember from our childhood, and perhaps some of us can see in people we know today.

It’s up to mature adult individuals (who, unlike our younger counterparts, have both the intelligence and often the power to effectively deal with bullies) to show people like Paul that shit like this will not stand. Nobody, adult or child, deserves to be treated this way, in any context. It is the duty of mature adult individuals to stop people like Paul, and perhaps all that’s needed is for these sorts of stories to reach the public. Eventually this will die down and Paul can work his way back from the ashes(and I wish him luck in doing so, the internet can be overwhelmingly cruel), but here’s hoping that this is a humbling experience for him. If his daily behavior even begins to resemble how he has behaved online he needs to take a long hard look at how he acts to others, because nobody should have to tolerate a bully, schoolyard or not.

So last article I discussed some of Yahtzee’s more gameplay oriented works, now I’m going to dive into his most significant game series: The Chzo Mythos. Split into four parts (originally only intended to be one, then two standalone games), the Chzo Mythos is a series of horror adventure games made using AGS. The Chzo Mythos series is best known for its story and narrative pacing. Adventure Games, for the uninitiated, are a type of game which is usually more narrative than gameplay focused, with simplistic exploration and inventory based point-and-click gameplay. Because getting stuck on a logic puzzle for an hour is no fun, I’ve also included a guide for each game, don’t feel shy to consult them when in a bind.

So, read on to see each of the four parts of Yahtzee’s current Magnum Opus, and make sure the lights are off and the sound is turned up…

Also, before we begin, while the first game is largely appropriate for anyone, parts 2, 3, and 4 (3 especially) contain some content that some may find disturbing, if you don’t care for mutilated pixel-corpses(and lots of them), you may want to give this a pass; but play part 1(5 Days a Stranger) at least.

5 Days a Stranger is the first game in the series, made in 2003. As the name implies, the game takes place over 5 days and involves a group of strangers. Trilby, now in Britain 2 years after The Art of Theft(Art of Theft was a prequel), is following a call from his current fence, who has found him a rather nice manor estate under the name of DeFoe that is ripe for the picking… Not is all as it seems though, as a creaky foreboding house quickly turns into a nightmare as 5 strangers (Trilby included) are trapped inside, at the mercy of some evil force.

Make sure to safe often, there is no autosave and it is possible to die at two points. Also, I find the F1-F5 keys are useful for swapping commands, somewhat diminishing the clunkiness of the interface. You can Download 5 Days a Stranger Here, and you can read the help guide Here.

Second in the series, 7 Days a Skeptic takes place almost exactly 400 years in the future. The game involves, you guessed it, 7 days and a group of people who become quite skeptical of each other and their situation as a whole. The game stars Doctor Johnathan Somerset, counselor aboard a derelict scouting vessel with a skeleton crew, dedicated to a mundane charting mission in space. Things take a rather sharp turn for the worse when the vessel discovers a large metallic object floating in space, sealed within are some seemingly random items and a note that urges the reader to jettison the capsule back into space. The note is signed with the name Trilby…

Save often, death is easy in several locations. You can download the game Here, and view the guide Here.

The third game in the series, my personal favorite, differs in both name and gameplay. Trilby’s Notes takes place several years after 5 Days a Stranger, featuring Trilby attempting to unravel the mystery of the evil behind DeFoe manor, and finally vanquish the evil he thought he had destroyed. However, as always, all is not as it seems. The game uses a text parser instead of traditional point and click controls, you essentially type what you want Trilby to do (aside from walking). this control scheme has it’s flaws and merits, but it makes the game much more involving in my opinion.

you can download the game Here, and check out the guide Here.

Returning to form, there are 6 days and point and click controls in the final entry in the series. Rather than preface the plot I’ll let you find out for yourself on this final entry.

You can download the game Here, and you can read the guide Here.

Those hungry for more of this series will be happy to know that Yahtzee has written two short stories, one which centers on Trilby and is relatively spoiler free, and another which should not be read until you have finished the games. You can find the Trilby one Here, and the other one Here.

Lastly, Yahtzee is always making new games at a rate of one every year or two, and he has just recently announced his latest project on his oddly named blog fullyramblomatic. His next game will be a platformer made using Game Maker, no word on any specifics yet. The game is apparently very close to release, so keep an eye open.

Oh, and yes, the video review of Bit Trip Runner is still going to happen, eventually…

Anyway, I have a lovely series of dark and spooky games to show you over the next couple of days, to go with the Halloween vibe (shut up, I don’t care if I’m almost a week late), made by someone you may already know of. Ben ‘Yahtzee’ Croshaw, famed for his hilarious and oh so quotable Zero Punctuation review series is also a hobbyist game developer! Although most of his works are from many years ago, these pixelated games made using Chris Jones’s Adventure Game Studio have become cult classics, and with good reason. Although the gameplay of Yahtzee’s games is often clunky, Ben has proven himself (especially considering his lack of experience) to be quite skilled in generating tension and atmosphere.

Today I’m going to talk about Yahtzee’s two platformer/action games. The first of these games focuses on Yahtzee’s most popular character: Trilby.

Trilby: The Art of Theft takes place 2 years before the events of the horror game series Trilby is also involved in (more on that later), and tasks the player with pulling of daring heists and unraveling a giant conspiracy. Players deftly stealth through the abodes of the rich and powerful while nicking loot and influential information. As far as gameplay is concerned, Art of Theft is easily Yahtzee’s best game, but it lacks the characteristic deep story of Yahtzee’s other popular titles. Still, it serves as an excellent transition into Yahtzee’s style of art and storytelling. Although not scary, Art of Theft is still sufficiently dark to fit the Halloween theme. You can download Art of Theft Here, all of Yahtzee’s games are completely free.

The next game I have for you is 1213, which is Yahtzee’s first platformer game and is not only much darker in tone, but also far more story focused. Sadly it’s lack of focus on gameplay makes the mechanics of the game somewhat clunky. While not unbearable, 1213 suffers from poor control at times, and while this is largely mitigated by the game being designed with this in mind, it can be quite frustrating (you’ll know what I mean when you try a running jump). Despite it’s gameplay shortcomings, 1213 more than makes up for it with a great story told from the perspective of a sickly prisoner who can’t even remember more than the dimensions of his cell and the number a shadowy man in bright white glasses mockingly calls him by. Break free from your cell and discover the horrors of the world outside: a place that, should you have been able to remember, you may have wishing to simply hide from in your cell.

1213 is a great little game split into three parts, with a special edition packing them all into one and featuring a short prequel(which I personally recommend you skip on the first playthrough, it messes up early parts of the story’s pacing in my opinion) and commentary. The special edition used to cost $5, but is currently free as Yahtzee makes his money from Zero Punctuation now. 1213 (the game’s protagonist) must run, jump, shoot, explore, and (most importantly) survive in order to unravel the mystery of his forgotten life while encountering all kinds of danger, both real and imaginary. Because of the fragile state of 1213′s mind and body, the very fabric of reality sometimes bends against him, and the forgotten and repressed evils of his mind become far more dangerous than any real obstacle.

1213 can be downloaded Here, do note that the game contains lots of pixilated blood and some really depressing and dark themes, mature players only! (Art of Theft should however be suitable for anyone.)

Click Here for part 2 of this Article

Hello folks, I’ve got a tentative very soon to give you as far as the completion of the review goes, the touch typing project will continue as my first university term starts (lots of practice opportunities). As my summer of wasted time passes, you can expect a lot more activity going on here.

The fellows in the picture above are Gabe and Tycho from the incredibly popular Penny Arcade website, known primarily for its hilariously witty and often quite dark web-comic.

Penny Arcade is also known for its yearly convension: PAX, and other things like its charity program: Child’s Play, and its video section: PATV. Perhaps less prominent among Penny Arcade’s works is a four part game series, which has had a troubled history.

A few years back Penny Arcade decided to team up with hothead games and take a foray into game creation instead of just critique. The result was the four part episodic game Series On the Rain Slick Precipice of Darkness. A game set in a pseudo 1920’s universe in a fictional town known as New Arcadia. The game heavily features the characters of Gabe and Tycho translated into an occult magic-filled 1920’s universe, along with all the expected wit and hilarity that Penny arcade delivers. Dark powers brood at every corner, and a series of events are about to be set in motion that may well bring about the end of the world! Gave, Tycho, and yourself team up as the three members of the Startling Developments Detective Agency, and attempt to thwart the growing presence of four dark gods battling for supremacy in the shadows.

The presentation and narrative really make the games; going forward I was primarily excited about the Penny Arcade game series because I wanted to see how the comic would be transposed into a different medium. The transition only improved upon the excellent style used in the Penny Arcade comic. With Gabe’s art woven into cutscenes and emulated (although not perfectly) ingame, and Tycho’s excellent writing and knack for comedy present at every turn, the presentation for the game was incredible.

Gameplay was not perfect however, and while the mixture of RPG and action game mechanics work well to start, they become tedious as you get used to them. The mechanics lack longevity and I can’t help but feel that they weren’t a perfect fit to the Penny Arcade style; close, but not close enough. That may be the reason why the game series eventually fell apart. The second episode sold very poorly, and while the first two episodes continue to be available online, the third and fourth were cancelled about two years ago.

Having only recently recently completed the second episode (they’re $7 each on Steam, a total steal at around 5 hours each), I was very disappointed to hear this news, and immediately commenced digging through the internet to find out anything I could. Well as luck would have it, I picked a very opportune time to finish the second episode, as I managed to find these on the website of retro RPG game developer Zeboyd and from various news sites respectively:

“Zeboyd Games is pleased to announce that we are currently working on Penny Arcade Adventures: On the Rainslick Precipice of Darkness Episode 3.

Yes, we’re serious.” – Zeboyd

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“We originally had the idea of an NES-style RPG [for the third episode] last year, but we couldn’t find the right people to do it, After we saw Zeboyd’s Breath of Death VII and Cthulhu Saves the World, we knew we didn’t have to look around anymore. Zeboyd was a perfect match.” – Jerry Holkins (Real life Tycho)

While overjoyed that this series has not met its last, I’m somewhat apprehensive of the new presentation style. I have no doubt that the series is in good hands, and to be fair I have never played one of Zeboyd’s games, but I just can’t help but feel that a retro art style just doesn’t suit the series. For me, the manner in which the first two episodes were presented was my prime motive for buying them. They were presented perfectly, full stop, no need for change or adjustments or improvements (except perhaps a little more effort in the 3d models). It was the gameplay that bogged the game down, and it seems like the series will be getting a fresh style of both gameplay and presentation. hopefully everything will work out fine, but I am unsure, as there was no need to redesign the visual style, even if Zeboyd’s thing is 16-bit graphics.

Really though, take a look at the trailer for the first episode:

Now what attracted you most about what you saw of the game? I’m willing to best most people will answer with the presentation, the way it looked and sounded; and we may be in danger of losing that.

So, my ultimate message with this is that I hope that Episodes 3 and 4 stay as true to the first two as possible, as I would hate to see the series gain improvements to gameplay while losing it’s visual and auditory flair; it would be such a waste.

Either way, make sure to check out both of the first episodes on Steam, try the free demos if you just want a taste. Games are rated M for mature; primarily for violence and frequent yet excellently executed toiler humor. Make sure to let your thoughts be heard in the comments below.

So the guy in that video above is called the Medic, from Team Fortress 2, or TF2(which I pity you if you’ve never heard of). TF2 recently became completely free to play on PC, which could be a discussion in itself. TF2 has gone from its original retail model and is now micro transaction based. The core game is completely free through Steam, and extra goodies (such as better item drops and the ever sought after hats) are available after the purchase of one in game item, which costs as little as $5.00; a pittance for such a great game as TF2.

I love TF2, so much so that I’ve sunken well over 400 hours of total playtime into it, which is still very little by some standards. The medic is easily my favourite class, both because of his hilariously awesome personality(see video) and his role within the game. The medic isn’t meant to charge forth guns ablaze, but is instead meant to crouch behind the guy charging forth guns ablaze, keeping him alive. With his powerful and completely non-realistic medigun, the medic is responsible for keeping everybody on his team in one piece. For every other class in TF2, one of your primary goals is to kill other players, whereas if you’re a medic and you just want to make kills, you’re doing it wrong. Instead a medic makes do with holding the lives of his teammates in his hands (sometimes literally).

Just because the medic doesn’t kill doesn’t mean he isn’t important though, far from it. Good medics win games, and if you disagree with me then you’ve not had enough time with a good medic on your side. By healing and supporting teammates, the medic doesn’t secure victory like the soldier, scout, or demoman, instead he enables victory for his team. His healing beam makes it possible for others to succeed, and as a result he succeeds himself. For those of you who’ve played TF2, try to think of how many times you’ve lost a battle to an enemy solely because they had a medic helping them; lots of times right? Now think about how many times you’ve lost a match to an ubercharge(8 second invincibility boost from a charged medigun), or to a group of overhealed enemies; again, lots of times right?

The medic isn’t the hero running forth, shredding his enemies, kicking ass and taking names; he’s much more than that. He’s the guy that’s providing the gusto for the hero, the guy who’s making sure that hero isn’t being blasted to pieces, and that is in itself an entirely different but just as awesome sort of heroism. As a medic I feel proud knowing that, while I may not always be the guy standing on the captured point bragging to my team over voice chat, if it weren’t for me, that guy would be nothing more than a smouldering heap of giblets. And that is why I love support roles, we enable victory, you do the dirty work in securing it. And whenever people are arguing over whoever is the best on the team, I can always end that argument simply by saying “if it weren’t me, you’d all be dead!”

As for touch typing, that project is on hold. I’ve recently acquired a new computer with a lovely new keyboard; yet sadly I am stuck in my old desk, which was not designed with a desktop computer in mind. A new desk is coming in 1-2 weeks, and I would rather wait for it, and a better place to put my keyboard, than continue learning touch typing in the wrong position. Once the new desk arrives I will continue my touch-typing endeavors, but until then the project is on hold. I’ll make sure to post an update when that changes.